I have no support in this and so many of the DW have just accepted this life I just cant ,I want more There are so many days I wish I had a normal life and he had a normal duty. Patriarchal leadership is something that most women in the world valued until recently, but it is still a chief value with Mormons.
We also live in a foreign country which is another element of difficulty.
I have feeling you stopped pursuing anyone unlikely to go for you. You need to do this ceremony first where you end up pledging all your money and property to the church: It's cruel to suggest it.